Faith is an oddly phenomenal thing. I remember reading the biography of George Mueller as a child, and wishing deeply, I could have that kind of faith.
Faith believes what we cannot see.
That’s it. So early in our marriage, we wanted to trust God and we wanted to be consistent in our belief in His sovereignty, not just in the easy places. It seemed, then, that included the area of life–especially that, since we believed God is the author of all life. Plus, it seemed such a sacred area–much bigger than buying a house or car, and I didn’t even feel adequate for the decision of if/when.
If we had waited until we could afford children, we would never have had any. If I had waited until I was more patient, a better mother, etc….no children. (Raw Uncensored Thoughts of a Mother with Ten Children)
But that’s not really faith, by definition. It is believing that He will provide for our needs, when those needs arrive and not a day sooner. We pray the Lord’s prayer, but none of us really wants to be tested on that “daily bread” thing. Yet, that’s where God wants us.
It may seem strange that we gave our fertility, all willy nilly, into the Lord’s hands. But I can say this: I’m so, so thankful for each of my children, for what each one teaches me, and for the exciting journey of walking in faith, seeing God fulfill His promises every step of the way, and knowing, without a doubt that God is who He says He is; otherwise, we wouldn’t have made it.
We’ve even had some mind-blowing, marveling at those “nothing is impossible with God” moments. We have peace seeing God’s eternal hand in our family in this short life.
How will we pay for college? Ha. We won’t. But if they need to go to college, there will be a way. How do I know? Because He hasn’t failed us yet.
Our earthly treasure may be stretched thin (and only by American standards), but we are very rich. I wouldn’t trade that to be a little more comfortable. My children have been more loved, not less, because of the numbers in our family to love them. They have gotten to witness His faithful provision. They have learned that each of them is intrinsically valued, even though in our society, their value decreases with birth order.
We like to be in control. A lot. But I wonder what we miss (I’m talking to myself) because we don’t completely trust Him? The joys, the beauty, the wonder and miracles of a life totally abandoned to His leading? I still have so much work to get to that place.
I’m not saying limiting your family size is wrong. I’m offering my personal perspective on the joys of closing your ears to the typical responses against more children. There are hard things in life; I’m not talking about that.
I’m talking about simply believing God, welcoming children and knowing that He will meet your needs when they come. He always does.