Home marriage Make-over Part 1: Am I Trustworthy?

Make-over Part 1: Am I Trustworthy?

by Kelly Crawford

It’s hard to know where to begin with our makeover! We are women, most of us wives and mothers, some of us yet to be; and there are some foundational aspects to the true beauty of womanhood that overlap into our specific roles as wives and mothers. Some will apply to us generally, as women; others will cross over into our roles as wives.

(By the way, if you are unmarried, take notes and soak this in. I wish I had been given more direct teaching about being a wife before I learned so many bad habits!)

First, let’s understand our fundamental duties:

“A wise woman builds her house; but a foolish one tears it down with her hands.”

We are builders, and as such, we must cultivate the feminine characteristics of our building profession.

“A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband.”

We are a symbol of honor and royalty to our husbands, and must learn what it is to “adorn” him in such a way.

So all these traits we will be discussing are central to our roles as “builders” and “crowns”.

The first trait on the list is *trustworthiness*.

From Proverbs 31 we read:

“The heart of her husband safely trusts in her….she does him good all the days of her life.”

What does it mean to be trustworthy? Simply, “worthy of confidence…dependable.”

*A note for the single women: this verse implies that she is trustworthy even BEFORE she is married (all the days of HER life). A woman must conduct herself in such a way that she has been honorable, even before marriage.

Here are some questions to ask ourselves:

  • Does my husband trust me with his reputation…even when he’s not present? (This includes how I speak about him to my mom.)
  • Does my husband trust me with his rawest emotions? Can he trust me enough to share his failures and expose his weaknesses, confident that I will still honor him and not hold his faults against him?
  • Does my husband trust me to make wise purchasing decisions? Even when I buy groceries, am I asking the Lord to guide my decisions and direct me to make the best use of our finances?
  • Does my husband trust me to guard my relationships?
  • Does my husband trust me to keep our home a priority over outside activities? (Are his socks getting washed? ;-))
  • Does my husband trust me with our children? With their physical needs but also their emotional health? Am I investing in their hearts, or am I letting demands of the house loom larger than relationships?
  • Does my husband trust me to maintain my physical appearance? To keep well-groomed, neat and healthy?
  • Does my husband trust me to study nutrition and strive to provide healthy meals?
  • Does my husband trust me to respect his God-given authority, as I demonstrate that through seeking his preferences?

A trustworthy woman is a beautiful thing, indeed. May the world see that quality in us as we represent our husbands and our homes to them.


Part 2:  Make-over: Clothed in Strength and Honor

Part 3:  Make-over: Discretion

Part 4:  Make-over: But I’m Not Meek & Quiet!

part 5: Make-over: Chaste?

Part 6:  Make-over: Teacher of Good Things

Part 7:  Make-over: Contentment is Lovely

Part 8:  Make-over: Wise Women Build

Part 9:  Make-over: The Total Beautiful Woman


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Ruth September 15, 2008 - 3:27 pm

You have no idea how much you inspire me (even when we disagree…and that hardly happens) 😀


Word Warrior September 15, 2008 - 5:58 pm

Thanks Ruth! Just remember, these posts are NOT, “Hey, I figured it out so I thought I’d tell you.”

They are rather, a daily “public journal” of sorts, as I share with you what the Lord is telling ME.

Looking in, I pray readers don’t forget that I am a struggling, sinful “Lord help me” kind of woman 😉

Mommy Reg September 15, 2008 - 6:47 pm

I love the questions you pose. They hit the nail on the head. I am excited to be challenged in this area as God reveals His heart to you. And you share your heart with us.

Diane September 15, 2008 - 7:50 pm

I am very excited you are doing this. I do think it is something we all need to focus on…and that I’ve been trying. God works through you, so I am glad you are sharing your heart with us. I know your thoughts and questions will help stretch me and I continue my journey!


Rebekah September 15, 2008 - 10:42 pm

Thank you for taking the time to share this! I know it will be very edifying!

In Christ,
Rebekah H.

Kim M. September 16, 2008 - 7:46 am

Thanks Kelly, I need this so much!

Amity September 16, 2008 - 10:02 am

Those are great questions!!! I will be pondering those and searching my heart. I am so grateful that you are doing this “make-over”!!

Jennifer July 30, 2009 - 8:48 pm

Ouch! But thank you. I need this. Keep it up!

Jennifer July 30, 2009 - 10:15 pm

“Does my husband trust me with his reputation…even when he’s not present?”

Ugh. In one modern romance book I read, a conservative book no less, there was an arranged married couple (a prince and a princess) who didn’t consummate their marriage on their wedding night. Everyone else pretty much knew they hadn’t done it yet. Then, months later, when they finally did, the wife felt the need to tell her mom, even about how she approached her husband wearing just a cute little T-shirt. Nothing graphic, but why would she tell her that?? Her husband, in turn, felt the need to write a note to the nosy butler telling him not to bother his wife because she was sleeping in…in his room. Hence, the butler found out about their lovemaking too, ran to show his equally annoying wife the note the prince gave him, and then the two of them shared a kiss, as if the royal consummation was THEIR occasion to celebrate! UGH! Why would a wife feel the need to share such an intimate thing with her mother? And the husband, telling that butler? It was as though everyone in the house was just waiting to hear that the couple had had sex. They shouldn’t have known a thing about it. Absolutely insufferable, and the idea that a Christian book would seemingly okay such inappropriate nonsense makes it all the worse.

» Free True-Beauty Make-over! June 9, 2010 - 8:33 pm

[…] Make-over: Am I Trustworthy? […]

Mary Jo June 10, 2010 - 1:03 pm

purchasing decisions…
home a priority…
physical appearance…
(Definitely need to work on these!)

Thanks for the reminder!

Miranda May 28, 2013 - 11:49 am

I am so excited for this series! I will be following it with an open heart! You couldn’t have done this at a better time. 🙂

Word Warrior May 28, 2013 - 11:51 am


I think it is certainly timely for us all as we are in constant need of reminding (at least I am). You may notice that I actually wrote the series in Sept. 2008! But felt the need to revisit it again.

Make-over Part 9: The Total Beautiful Woman - Generation CedarGeneration Cedar July 11, 2015 - 1:33 pm

[…]  To start at the beginning, go to Make-over Part 1: Am I Trustworthy? […]


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