Generation Cedar

What is Success in Parenting Teens? If You're A Parent, You Can't Miss This.

Parenting is hard. And if you’re like me, the longer you’re a parent, the more you realize you don’t know what you’re doing. Because every child, every temperament and every personality is different. Even if you figured it out with one, you’ll be scratching your head with the next.

But there are some things foundational to all of parenting, and it’s those things we need to remind ourselves of and practice.

Too often, our emotions get in the way of good parenting. If we were brutally honest, we’d admit that most of our parenting is centered around getting our kids to behave the way that will bring us the least stress and inconvenience. That’s parenting out of selfishness; but we are called to parent from a place of sacrifice.

Our parenting should be for our children. And because they are children–and sinful at that–parenting is a marathon that requires daily perseverance, patience and grace.

GRACE!!! That’s missing too often. Amid the boundaries and discipline that are most necessary, we have to parent from a place of grace, helping our children understand their need of a Savior in their disobedience.

Which is why I was so convicted and moved by Paul David Tripp’s brief admonition in the video Grace Liberates Your Parenting. I’ll admit, I cried more than a few tears, and then I begged the Lord to help me up again to run this race He’s called me to.

Do yourself a favor and watch it. Here’s another short article he wrote, What is Success in Parenting Teens, that is so excellent.

If you’re a parent, you simply must hear this message. And then, I’d love to chat about it in the comments. We’re in this together, and having a place to share our struggles is a good thing.


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8 Responses

  1. Although the youtube link is inspiring (Who you are, a message to all men), I don’t think it is the right one. I’m also getting a forbidden by Yahoo message when I click What is Success When Parenting Teens.

  2. Thank you for sharing. My pre-schoolers is far from teenagers, but the message is just as relevant. God is gracious.

  3. This from the video (around the 14-minute mark) really spoke to me:

    We’re not requiring the change as an event. We’re allowing it to be a process, and letting the Spirit of God work.

    Amen. So hard to remember the importance of process — driven by the Spirit — when all we want is a specific end result, right now, thank you very much.

    Sanctification is a lifelong process for all of us, and remembering God’s mercy and grace on us adults as we undergo that process is key to shepherding our children just as our Lord leads us — without haste or a “when-will-you-ever-learn?” attitude.

    I am thankful for how the Lord has patiently taught me so much during these 25 years I’ve been a parent. It is only by His grace I’ve begun to see the difference between law-based and grace-based parenting, and am heading in the grace-based direction now.

    The enemy likes to prod me about the mistakes I’ve made with my children while under the influence of law-based thinking in my parenting. Especially concerning the two who are past their teen years now.

    There are also subtle attacks now that I’m learning to parent my younger children from a place of grace. “Will they totally stray from being too easy on them” has entered my mind more than a few times.

    satan distorts and twists, but God in His faithfulness is there every step of the way, His Spirit guiding both our children and us parents. All through our lives. We are more than conquerors…

    Hang in there, moms. (Talking to myself, too.) God isn’t finished with any of us yet. 😉

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